Posted by: wildflowerz | March 26, 2010

Your mother shows up in a nasty dress. It’s your turn now to stand where I stand. Everybody lookin’ at you here

I’m not sure where this is going to end up, so I apologize in advance if I meander.

When I was in kindergarten, evidently I had a crush on a boy.  His name was Ike.  At this point, 28 years later, I don’t actually remember the having of the crush.  What I remember is his rejection (though it wasn’t me that said anything to him) and the incessant teasing from my mom, my aunt, my cousin…  The rejection, whatever.  It was kindergarten.  He told me one day he didn’t like me and I remember being dismayed because I certainly didn’t tell him I liked him.  However, my aunt lived near him and she and her daughter teased me about it ALL THE TIME.  Did they make it up or did I really have a crush on him?  I don’t know.  I honestly can’t remember.  I don’t remember really liking boys until maybe 4th grade, really, but who knows.  It was a long time ago.

Fast forward (or maybe rewind because did I mention I can’t remember shit?) to another time.  I was taking dance classes (ballet and tap) so it must have been kindergarten or first grade.  At one point, I did a recital as a cat (we danced to Stray Cat Strut, of course).  During this time, I drew a picture of a dancer on a stage.  I think the dancer was dressed as a cat, but that could be me mis-remembering, but it seems likely since I had to dress as one.  Well, I drew a long, winding….thing that came out from between the person’s legs and wound around on the stage.  I don’t remember if it was a tail or not and I don’t remember what I told me mom.  It doesn’t really matter and that’s not the point.  The point is that a few weeks or so after that, we had a get together for my mom’s side of the family.  It was some sort of picnic and we were all gathered at my uncle’s place out in his yard.  We all were just sitting down to eat and my mom stands up and whips out this drawing I did.  She told everyone that I drew it and that was a penis coming out from between the legs.  The entire family laughed at me the rest of the day.  Now, was it a penis?  It might have been.  I wasn’t like that kid in SuperBad that drew penises all the time (or any other time than this one that I can remember).  I was 5 or 6 years old and I’m sure that was about the time I was curious.  It doesn’t matter if it was a penis or not, but I was mortified.  How do you do that to a kid?

So, I was thinking of those two instances this week.  I’m not sure what made me think of the second one, but I wrote earlier in the week that my girl had a crush on a boy in her class and I thought it was the cutest thing ever.  It did make me laugh because she was being so cute.  We all share anecdotes about our kids.  But I would never humiliate my daughter like I was humiliated.  I’ve seen other people do humiliating things in front of their kids, obviously embarrassing them needlessly, and I just don’t get how people can be so thoughtless.

Anyway, for an update on my daughter, she now has a crush on a different boy.  The first one told her he “didn’t really love her” after one of her classmates told the boy about her crush.  So now:  different boy crush.  This one’s the one boy from her class who came to her bday party.  She learned and only told two friends who aren’t blabbermouths.  /giggle

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Responses

  1. We have to work hard to not screw up our kids. If you ever hear me humiliate one of my kids or make fun of them or whatever, please call me on it. I talk aboiut them in my blog, and make it amusing, but I never mean it in an embarassing way and I hope I never say anything that I wouldn’t want them to be able to read for themselves. You’re good mom. Thinking something is cute is not the same as what was done to you. *HUGS*


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